A little prayer; What’s behind Door #3?

I’ve worked with a lot of my “false” beliefs and “stuck in a rut” patterns, which I recognize kept me in my unfulfilling and emotionally cumbersome, YET cozy, detrimental DARK prison.

I recognized a while ago that even with the awareness of ME some of these beliefs have rallied, making me feel at times I’m in a battle with myself. As far as I’d come in realizations and change, I felt as though I was tap-dancing away on the stagnant ship “ Hesperus”. This is “all about me” and no one else.

So as I’ve done in the past I made an honest appeal a few months ago. I don’t put rules to use in how I ask, it’s all my verbiage cuz then it is MY truth. Not a prayer for a lifetime, just a “pick me up” for the help I needed in the present. Without getting into details of what was actually going on in my life at that moment… Here is what I asked.

My request of (fill in the blank) God, Universe, My higher self, Archangels, Angels, Buddha, Jesus, Spirit Guides, Spirit Animals, Kahuna and any other light beings that want to help a chick out.

I am asking for 10 things.

The help I need specifically is to PLEASE show me kindly and clearly (as I need to bite the bullet & get the over 40 pair of glasses), illuminate opportunities (more than a flashlight, a spotlight would be great) and bring the people, places and things (yes, take me to the water) that will fulfill my objective, prayer, request, yell for help, smoke signals or whatever you want to call it, because it is obvious I need a team. No more bootstrapping it (this is not 1885) or hard knocks (ouch!) for me, no sir!

So, team I need all of you to help me with the following and I will do my best to pay attention for signs and actual wishes granted from you; no need to hit me over the head with the proverbial angelic baseball bat, but I may trip right over some of the support or completely disregard a leprechaun at my door, but I will do my human best to be present and open to what you bring.

1.    To be WIDE open to being in a happy, kick-ass, better than peanut butter marriage.
a.     I’m a recovering commitment-phobe and this is a stretch—I have been a fool for love though and WANT to be a BIGGER FOOL. 
b.     I do love pie too and I am thinking shades of grey are okay, but clarity is a must, and I can dive into that head first just like I’m 20 again.

2.    The ability and actual implementation of recognizing what is GOOD for me.

a.   Not what is necessarily in front of me, behind me or next to me—time to be FULLY awake to taking the less traveled path which smells better than new car scent, but uncomfortable enough that it is different than the old road from Mapquest and we all know how reliable that is… its time for Google Maps.

3.    Build more authentic confidence in all areas of my life with my business, men, my art and as a Mom.

a.     I’ve come a long way from thinking I suck in every way possible. Now its not daily, it is situational and usually has something to do with an old belief….and those I like to pop like zits.

4.    Recognizing and embracing kindness and unconditional love everywhere; inside and out! Nuff said.

5.    Prosperity and wealth leading to FULFILLING success.

a.     Can you say self-sabotage? I am pretty savvy at recognizing the mind-set that leads to pitching myself off a cliff, but I need help with my financial disconnect….it’s time for the pot o’gold literally and metaphorically.

6.    Keep me focused on writing and completing MY book
a.     Writing my book as a not yet uber success, yet having achieved a ton of inner peace, basically rid myself of most anxiety and depression… And helped others to go for their dreams…. I have a few different book titles and therein lies the focus issue: 1. The manual to the universe; 2. F*** dreams, make it a reality, or 3. If I’m okay why does my life suck ass?

7.    Sell my artwork, by providing places.

8.    I ask to see clearly the ways I invite punishment and suffering into my life and give me the insight on the action I need to change that belief.

a. It is time for me to stop picking the booby prize, donkey behind door #3. C’mon Monty, help me to stop in the name of LOVE all the ways I show up not totally digging me, that give the appearance, I somehow euphorically am drawn to living in an iron maiden emotionally.

9.    Focus on my talents with peace and joy
a. And as my friend Vanessa says…”Peace be with you”. Being drawn to what I love gives me peace and joy, let not the cannons on the field in front of me go off and stop me from my bliss.

10. Be appreciative and grateful all the way as I accept my imperfections.

a. I am pretty damn good at this one, though sometimes I forget, like when I’m in my car getting ready to pull out of a parking space and an older lady comes to my window to complain about how I parked. I won’t get into the ensuing conversation or how others park which creates less than desirable circumstances. This woman needed to remind me I wasn’t perfect and we are all mirrors for one another.

THANK YOU MY BLESSED TEAM…I feel like I am at Disneyland.

All to be done with ease, grace and happiness for my fulfilling life. 

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