Gone Bananas!

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Yup, it’s my new favorite breakfast, lunch and dinner. Okay, well maybe not dinner, but it is just a perfect blend of chocolate and banana frozen together for a very satisfying flavor explosion¬†of ecstasy in every bite. Mmmmm, mmmmm GOOD!

This post isn’t really about my one-item smorgasbord. It’s about going bananas! Or something like that.

I woke up today, after having a fun little get together in my backyard last night. I have a very cool fire-pit and wonderful space to entertain. But I am getting off topic here. Where was I? Oh yeah, waking up.

I did my meditation, which is guided, because for me I need something to focus on and I tend to pull them off YouTube, which is great unless you get the commercials about something violent as you’re trying to listen to the birds, and nature.

I spent a leisurely morning trying to figure out a FUN way to write this post. I couldn’t think of one, so I recorded my latest podcast.

You see this blog post is supposed to cover goal-setting. And it just sounded so BORING, that I couldn’t wrap myself around it (I am giving away a real fun worksheet, yes it really is fun–you can download it below). To be even more honest, I have been in a place of HUGE ambivalence and resistance around some of my goals.

Do I really want what I say I want?

Let’s see. I do. Sorta. Well, let’s take one of my goals. I do want a relationship. And then I don’t.

I want one for some amazing reasons, truly I do. But, my ambivalence is in my laziness and my resistance is in the effort to actually make it a big focus in my life. I have a dating coach who has been listening to me dig my heels in about having ease around meeting someone…you know just having him show up on my doorstep (though that could be a bit scary, considering what would you do if someone showed up one day and said “Hi, I’m your new relationship!” LOL)

I love the idea of kismet, just meeting someone out of the blue. It’s happened before, I would love it to happen again.

Anyways, so back to the point of this blog: my resistance and ambivalence to my goal. Here’s the thing. When we (notice I said “WE”)….have a goal, there is bound to be some resistance and ambivalence. And to get clear, it is to determine if the competing issue, as in my case: my laziness to making an effort to go to singles’ parties, show up in places single men might be and continue with my online foray into the wonderful world of dating has a stronger value than my actual deep desire and goal of a happy, healthy relationship.

Of course, this comes after determining if this is an actual goal I want for myself, which it is and I can thank my little worksheet I put together! Yes, you can use it too and figure out if your unreachable goals are really ones you want or get some clarity on what’s standing in the way to get to em’, just click to download. (it’s free)

I know my competing value of laziness was super strong when I discovered it, which would explain my current dating issue (talking to men online and losing interest or not following through, because I made a decision quickly, so I could basically remain in ambivalence.) and as the days have gone by since my dating coach cornered my on my b.s……I am growing less lazy.

I am feeling less resistance and actually started looking around for how I can work at this (with ease) without making it into a second job. I am committed to the desire for a relationship, and that’s the key for everyone. Make sure your commitment to what you want is bigger than all your excuses!

Yes, it really is…just make it a bit bigger than the resistance and stay connected to the journey! Even when you feel a total disconnect, trust yourself to get back in the saddle, because you will, if you really want it! And it’s okay to have days when you have just gone bananas!

Oh and don’t forget to download this free worksheet. It helps!! Really. I figure whatever helps me can help you too.

Click to download, in case you haven’t yet!

The Manifesting List

Ever wonder how the same things continue to show up? Feel like you are stuck in a vicious cycle or keep attracting similar situations?

Check out this list on how you do it and how to gain more control.

  • Whatever we give our attention to, grows.

So, if you want more of it, keep doing it and if you want less, focus elsewhere. Have gratitude for what ‘is’ and focus less on what you wish it would be….watch how more of what you want, actually shows up.

  • Lies are based on a belief that you may¬†lose something or be embarrassed by the truth.

It’s¬†a sign of lack of trust in the self to handle disappointment. Want to really attract amazing people and opportunities, start getting real with yourself and see what you are denying.

  • If you believe that all relationships turn bad or end, you will fulfill that goal. Your subconscious is the map, it tells the conscious mind where to go.

Do you have a negative belief about you or relationships, guess what? The subconscious will fulfill it for you. Instead, get a spotlight to shine on the WHY behind the belief and get uncomfortable, as you take action in a positive direction. (funny, how the words uncomfortable and positive go together) This will create new beliefs.

  • If you believe more good exists inside of you than a voice kicking your butt, the perception you have will make sure¬†the¬†outside will match. (even when negative circumstances arise–you will see it as temporary, not life defining)
  • Engaging in¬†playing games, means sooner or later you’ll end up the loser. Be real.

Authenticity gives your life real¬†meaning. When you play a part, the return on it, never is permanent. Dig deep to find your truth–then act on it, without attachment to the outcome. Most of the time, your results are 9000% better than if you had faked it til you won it.

  • If you don’t believe you have value, you’ll look for situations affirming this belief or create them to show you are indeed, without worth.

Awareness of these core beliefs and questioning their validity will help you to not get triggered into going down the same ol’ road.

  • In¬†loving someone, try to tell¬†your conscious mind it doesn’t mean attachment or expectations are included in the deal.

No one else can fix you or make life better, unless you’re already doing something about it–so even if the love of your life came through the door, nothing would feel one iota better, until you fulfill your own needs first.

  • No matter how much you love someone you cannot stop them from doing self destructive or stupid shit, only they can stop themselves if they want to….or not.

Let go of trying, let go of taking them and their actions personally. You can do nothing to change them, unless they are already doing it themselves.

  • If you really sit with the discomfort inside of you, that you may want someone else to relieve, you’ll find you are your own best medicine.

Stay with the anxiety, the neediness, the emptiness or whatever it is causing you pain. It won’t kill you and you’ll find the temporary relief you get from someone else doesn’t compare to the permanent relief you can offer yourself.

  • Assumptions are dream killers–you can talk yourself out of anything you want (especially if it requires change) just by assuming some story, which may or may not be true. ¬†

If you don’t know, it’s okay, because even if you THOUGHT you knew–most of the time it doesn’t assure the outcome. Spending countless hours analyzing, strategizing and stressing will only lead to more inertia. Action trumps thought, show your ‘mind’ that all assumptions are b.s. and get out there and live your dreams.

This is just a starter EQ (emotional quotient) list. Growing your emotional intelligence will grow your ability to attract amazing people and situations to your personal and professional life.

Power of Change

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Stagnation. Settling. Stuck-ville.

This is the norm for many of us. We may say we want more, get excited or angry about our circumstances, but hold onto it, rather than take a step toward change.

‚ÄúDon’t wait for the right answer and the golden path to present themselves. This is precisely why you’re stuck. Starting without seeing the end is difficult, so we often wait until we see the end, scanning relentlessly for the right way, the best way and the perfect way. The way to get unstuck is to start down the wrong path, right now. Step by step, page by page, interaction by interaction. As you start moving, you can’t help but improve, can’t help but incrementally find yourself getting back toward your north star. You might not end up with perfect, but it’s significantly more valuable than being stuck. Don’t just start. Continue. Shift. Repeat.‚ÄĚ ~ Seth Godin

Often when people contact me, they believe they are looking to change their circumstances. Or so they think. Until they are actually in the hot seat of having a path toward change, then many people find excuses to stay just where they are!

Change scares the bajeezus out of many of us!!!!

It’s never about the time or money, because let’s face it when we want to buy some new outfit, car, or even a house…we will find a way, if we want it bad enough! But when it comes to change, we will find excuses until the cows come home!

The key to change, as in, when most of us finally are open to the power of change, happens when we reach this point:

“When our current situation, is no longer an option, we can¬†finally move in a different direction.”

The issue with waiting for our circumstances to be so horrible that we can no longer distract ourselves, or find comfort anywhere else, is that it is an extreme stance on keeping things the same. It’s keeping things stuck where they are, because of the fear of loss being so much greater.¬†

When we spend days, months and years, sacrificing, complaining and finding others to commiserate, who help us to stay stuck…we¬†are in the process of creating regret for all the time wasted, because of our FEAR OF CHANGE.

I provide free 20 minute consultations on relationships.¬†Most people indicate they want to work with me at the end. People¬†get a lot out of those sessions, BUT when I mention the money to continue working together, whether it is $3.00 or¬†several times that amount…I know, it’s an opportunity for an excuse IF THE PERSON has NOT¬†gotten to the point, where they can NO longer live the way they are living.

Plus, after a 20 minute session, they feel they have the fuel to carry them to change on their own (at least for a few hours or a few days)….except they don’t, nothing really changes, except their growing discontent and pain.

Many of them are living in a ton of pain already, BUT prefer it to change. They have hope that somehow, some way, by waiting, holding their ground or some other form of stagnation things will miraculously work out how they want, especially in the area of love and relationships.

The Power Of Change is an opportunity.

Yes, it is unknown, if we are choosing to do something completely different than what is our usual comfort zone….we have NO IDEA what the outcome will be….

And that is what keeps us stuck, no assurance that we’ll have what we want….so we’ll stick with the shitty situation we got!

I remember when I was stuck in a relationship, I felt a connection, so strong and unbreakable that it made me NUTS! I wanted to cut it off, and did several times, but allowed it to keep coming back around several times. One day, I decided I was going to grow in this situation by COMMITTING TO MYSELF and taking risks.

My risk was not only asking myself, “What would love do,” as opposed to anger and annihilation, but what would be the most loving gesture for me to do, for me, right now? And in doing this, which made me anxious as hell, freaked out that I was losing control (even though it was to use guilt or reminding someone how much they hurt me, etc)…I had to navigate new waters.

I could not continue to waste time, energy and emotion staying stuck. The power in changing was massive. Not only did I learn to love myself, I found that when I soar ahead, either those who are also growing come along for the ride and those, who like to be stuck, stay put.

Seriously, staying stuck for the benefit of others, will NEVER GET US WHAT WE WANT!

EVER.

Finding the power in change, releases us to live more in alignment with our truth. We get closer to our dreams, in fact, where we felt it was impossible, it becomes possible!

Things stay impossible, because of our refusal to move ourselves in a different direction.

If you’re ready to change your relationship circumstances now, please contact me for a complimentary 20 minute¬†relationship makeover session.

Please email to schedule info@Tracycrossley.com 

The Power of Abundance III

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The power of abundance would seem obvious to most of us. The more abundance of things we deem as good, would put us in a position of power, right?

An abundance of health, wealth, love, peace, happiness, friends, food, etc… is what most of us would find very satisfying, perhaps even fulfilling.

‚ÄúLimitless undying love which shines around me like a million suns it calls me on and on across the universe.‚ÄĚ ~John Lennon

As human beings, we always have a desire for more. More life, more love, more affection, more money, more laughter, etc…

We can deny the desires, but why should we say “no,” to what we really want? If we want to live in the country, travel, get married, etc….and we’re not doing it or moving in the direction of it, we have to ask ourselves, WHY?

Abundance is unlimited, scarcity is limited. Abundance breaks the rules, scarcity colors within the lines. Abundance is relaxing, scarcity is constricting. Some of us feel guilty wanting more for ourselves and others believe we don’t deserve our dreams….and as long as we live in guilt or undeserving energy….we will continue to set up situations, which highlight scarcity.

Abundance did not come to me easily. I was not brought up to believe love and money grew on trees (but they do provide for both) and that you had to work super hard to rub two nickels together.

‚ÄúNot what we have, but what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance.‚ÄĚ
~ Epicurus

Getting to a place of allowing abundance in our lives can feel like we’re breaking all sorts of rules.

We may abide by certain¬†philosophies, which allow us to¬†honor¬†reasons to stay in scarcity. The power of abundance is scary, because it’s unlimited.

If the Universe is made up of a creative energy that has an intelligence, a sort of matching us where we are energy….and our energy is about manifesting through thought and action, wouldn’t the Universe mirror it back to us? As humans we have no control over timing or what an outcome actually looks like, but if we believe in the power of abundance we can approach it as a wide-eyed child.

Often life throws us a curve ball, but what if we approach dire or troubling situations from an unlimited, abundant perception? It could allow us to find the opportunity in a crisis.  

If we create rather than compete, we’re focused on the value of abundance–creating more rather than in scarcity, taking what someone else has in their possession.

‚ÄúThe measure of intelligence is the ability to change.‚ÄĚ ~ Albert Einstein

If more life is the goal of every living thing in the universe,¬†we have to get clear on what keeps our “thinking,” in scarcity. Where are we limited and when did we come to believe this as our truth?

‚ÄúDoing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life.‚ÄĚ
~ Wayne Dyer

The moment we engage in what we love, we are creating, when we’re creating…..we’re living in abundance. If we want to be in the Power of¬†Abundance now, what can we do?

1. Believe there is more rather than less for everyone. There is no competition.

2. Find what you love to create and start creating, even if you think you are not any good at it, do it with love and do it often.

3. Once you are in the habit of creating with love, believe in the abundance of it, focus on it with a goal (even if the goal is just more time to do what you love) meaning look for opportunities to come from what you love. They will.

4. From abundance the opportunity to give and receive fully, becomes easier. We energetically connect to more when we get out of our own way and include others.

Watch life change, as you become more accustomed to the unlimited, the possibilities that may have seemed impossible in the past, are now your reality.

If you missed the first two parts in the series, please click the links below:

Power of Presence I

Power of Balance II

If you’re interested in upping your abundance level, please contact me Tracy AT tracycrossley.com

Eating, Playing, Being and Orgasms

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Lately, orgasms have been a focal point in my writing. Let me preface it with, I can only speak from my experience as a woman.

It’s not the sexual act of having an orgasm as to what I’m clearly addressing today. How about the value of an orgasm as it relates to “being present,” and “having the life we¬†want.”

If we’re¬†fully present and engaged in an activity;¬†eating, playing, working, having sex or even just being, etc. we have a different experience of ourselves and the world.

BEING IN THE PRESENT MOMENT IS KEY TO FULFILLING SUCCESS AND HAPPINESS.

I use the word authenticity when describing living life on our terms and the ability to have an earth-shaking orgasm. Ya Ya!

Authenticity is who we truly are, beneath all the bullshit we tell ourselves we are or should be. It’s the truth; it’s the voice we often ignore, because it means we have to change what we’re doing, how we spend our time and perhaps, who we spend our time with too.

As an example, I’ve a client who is afraid to let go of her marriage. It is dead and over, they live in the same house, but there is no desire to work on things or come together, on either part. She has ignored her¬†inner voice for years, telling her to¬†move on. She lived with¬†excuses;¬†other people and their “possible,” opinions¬†seemed to matter more than her happiness. She’s still waiting for someone else to come and rescue her, or hoping her estranged husband will find someone else, or that some HUGE sign will show up, telling¬†her now is¬†the right time to go. None of this has happened and will more than likely not happen, she is being pushed to stand for her own life.

She has ignored that voice, her authentic truth….and her chance, to so far, live an amazing existence….and she’s¬†missing out on amazing orgasms too!!!

Think I’m kidding?

How can you have an amazing climax, when only part of you is present to do it? You can have an orgasm, but to have that fantastic out of this world experience…it’s equal parts mind, body and soul.

If you’re missing one, your life and your orgasms are lacking.

How many of us do this in different parts of our lives? And how many of us can truly let go of who we are not and be at our most open, vulnerable and raw state to experience life or sex?

To have what we want and create the life we deeply desire, it requires openness to ourselves first.

We must be connected to the TRUTH of what we want, not all the excuses that hold us back. When we have that unity in our mind, body and soul, it’s our most creative state to match to the unseen and create our reality.

We can also have a damn good orgasm.

I know when I’m in the state of building up to an orgasm, all of the molecules in my body are engaged, as is my spirit and my mind. It is a super intense focus!! Now, imagine creating our¬†lives with that love, sensuality, joy and fun!! ¬†And imagine the outcome being a climax, except this one doesn’t end.

When I am doing what I love and being true to myself, I wake up giddy in the morning!!

I practice self-care, my life is more in balance and it’s pretty orgasmic! When I’m working at something, which drains me, because I am afraid to lose the money or I’m in the company of people only because I am afraid to be alone…..I am disconnected. I am in fear. And sex…..um yeah….

Fear stands in the way of orgasms.

If we want to live a FULFILLING life, whether we’re just hanging out, spending time alone, working, exercising, eating, etc….we must be fully present. To be fully present requires us to be connected with all parts of ourselves. When we’re in fear this does not happen, we are only operating with a part of ourselves and denying the rest of us liberation.

Fear keeps us limited.¬†So, shuck the fear, get in the flow. There’s a whole other way to live this life starting with BE HERE, NOW.

If orgasms are far and few between or life feels like a flat line, please contact me, I can help!

Please click here: Tracy@Tracycrossley.com

Chasing Life

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Life is a journey, right?

Sometimes it comes easy and at other times it feels like we’re out there rock climbing without a rope.

I come from a place of being a doer.

I am all about taking action.

I often talk about mental masturbation as a place we can get stuck for eons, and talk ourselves right out of taking action toward what we really want.

I’ve¬†taken action for a multitude of¬†reasons in my life; motivated by excitement or¬†motivated by fear. Many times I also took action, because it was “my pattern, my way, of operating without much thought, because action was on¬†autopilot.

My¬†discovery was¬†the action I took in “autopilot” sprouted¬†from this fear, that if I don’t go after it, then it’ll not be there.¬†It pushed me out there; I thought no one would know me or find me, so¬†my job was¬†to tell¬†others to need me in certain situations.

I had to sell myself and show my value, so I wouldn’t starve or be forgotten.

Sigh–so tiring, right?

I recently found I was still doing it in places. In fact, I had a dream, where I kept asking people in the dream for attention, for what I wanted and give them no room or space to figure it out on their own.

I, physically, felt how I was going against myself and my gut. I knew that in the rapid-fire way of asking someone to give me attention, I was feeling worse and worse about myself in this dream.

When I woke, I thought of¬†my recent “lightbulb moments.” They were connected. I had always been chasing life, perhaps not as overtly or often as I used to, but when it came to my basic needs there definitely was still the fear driving me.

I’ve been without a home, without food¬†and when I was a lot younger, I lived in my car for a bit of time (more out of stubbornness than necessity) too.

I realized my lack of trust was still there; I didn’t believe things would work out for me. I didn’t trust my value, and I was so focused on a pattern (a major one) repeating in my life, apparently against my will, that I was disconnecting from me and my truth.

Confusion is the sign of a lesson.

Clarity has been uneven for the past 6 months. I have spent time really searching inside myself for clarity, for the karma in my life that apparently is standing in the way of where I intuitively feel I am supposed to be.

What am I talking about?

When we are on a path, paying attention to our inner calling, it’s not alway clear that life will fall into place. Often it does not and we can take it as a sign to jump off the path or stay with the course.¬†Clarity often comes last.

I must continue the course. Intuitively, I know it’s¬†where I’m headed. When we stay on the challenging path, it’s where our karma lies to be balanced, to teach us, so we grow. For me, it’s been either¬†action or allowing.¬†Desiring to be in¬†alignment and accepting circumstances as they are instead of trying to change them all the time. What is my lesson?

Make sense?

I’ve come to clarity with more to come.

First, ¬†there’s no purpose in exhausting ourselves to chase life.

Second, the lack of trust in ourselves and the Universe can cause us to get stuck in the same pattern over and over, trying to teach us what will actually simplify our lives.

Third, if we keep turning events and our reactions to our inner wisdom, clues do show up and one day we have an epiphany telling us the path we’re on is purposeful. Our perspective shifts and we start to see the opportunity rather than the challenges.

Fourth, the recognition of our own value comes from connecting and re-connecting (no one is connected to themselves 24/7) to our truth and staying with it, no matter what the path looks like ahead.

Fifth, no one else can offer proper judgment on our karma. We’re here to grow and learn. We are not on our own timetable, there is no rushing and chasing that needs to happen. We can relax and have faith that our challenges will give way to enlightenment and success.

 

 

 

3 Tips to Using Intuition Daily

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Many of us believe logic is the way to make a decision and for some things it may work out just fine.

The truth is “LIFE IS ILLOGICAL.”

We plan for A and B happens, we get upset and disappointed, because somehow we believe we have control over how everything goes, especially when we mapped it out so logically.

Intuition is alway in operation 24/7, it nudges us in the direction we should go……it is simple, not complicated (as our logical decisions where we analyze everything to the nth degree).

Most of us simply don’t trust it, we think it must be more complicated and often, it goes against what our “brain” says the right thing to do is in a situation.

The brain operates from experience and intuition from our truth. We always know the truth, but we let past experiences interfere in our journey, so as to keep us safe.

Intuition knows no time….intuition is not looking at the past as a barometer for what will happen in the future. if it didn’t work in the past, it doesn’t care…there is an opportunity for different circumstances, people and opportunities than there may have been in¬†the past moment.

How do we learn to trust it? To know it?

Besides meditation as a way to know ourselves, what can we do daily to check into intuition?

1. Press pause.

Most people who read my¬†posts, know¬†I recommend pausing for a variety of reasons.¬†Pausing gives us a minute to have our mind, body and spirit get in sync. When I am struggling with a decision or stressed, I pause for a moment and pay attention to what is going on inside of me….it’s an opportunity for the voice in my head to quiet down and the voice in my gut to be heard.

2. Feel the urge and follow it.

Our intuition can be felt physically. Whenever we feel like we fight the urge, we’re fighting our truth. The urge is our intuition directing us to where we should go. When I go against my gut, I almost always regret the decision. It doesn’t work out how I pictured it in my head and even if by chance it does….I don’t feel a sense of fulfillment. Intuition is a flow and we feel in the flow of life when we follow our intuition.

3. Test your intuition.

When we¬†are thinking about lunch,¬†it’s a great opportunity to stop. Just stop thinking and feel what our “gut” wants….and do it. Start testing it out when driving, just because we’ve always taken one road home, perhaps our gut is telling us to take another road. When we test our intuition, it is an opportunity to build trust in following its directions.

The more we test drive our intuition, the more we can rely on it for our successes in life, for the opportunities we might have missed had we just relied on our brain and its encyclopedia of experiences.

Intuition brings true freedom and leads us away from our subconscious programming….try a tip today and see what happens! ūüôā

Want to feel like a Winner? Stop Competing.

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In my early twenties, my career was in sales.

I hated the thought of it, cuz my warped idea of sales¬†was¬†like a used-car salesman: fake and conning people into something they didn’t want.¬†

In sales, I didn’t know¬†what the hell I was doing! My entire focus¬†was on getting through a call or dealing with rejection, so the thought of competition with others was a foreign concept.

I intuitively knew back then, competing with others never brings us fulfilling success.

We may temporarily feel like the king or queen of the mountain, when we win, but it quickly fades. We need something else to fulfill the ego, the emptiness and tell us we’re okay.

In sales and later sales management, my focus was never on the competition.

It wasn’t because I was without ego, it was because I was competing with myself to be MY best.

Whenever someone complemented my ability to bring in clients from¬†cold calls or land accounts that those around me deemed impossible….I didn’t feel good, I’d become afraid.

My first thought: “How will I sustain this? I will surely fail.”

My fear was letting ME down, because someone had recognized I did something well. I was so afraid of future criticism about failing, it spurred me for years!

I never felt like a winner.

I landed large accounts and would do the impossible, all while blocking out what others in my business would do…no comparing, no topping, no nothing….the thought of looking at someone else’s techniques or copying their way of selling, overwhelmed me. It just seemed to make it harder.¬†

When I got into coaching, it was accidental¬†(which is a story for another day)…and my classmates there, said¬†I had a natural talent for it! That scared me! Oh shit, now I had crazy-ass expectations of me.

Whenever we compare….whether it’s to ourselves and our own expectations… or to another….we take our joy away. The last thing we’ll feel like is a winner in the long run. Instead, we’ll find more ways to believe we¬†must keep up, copy someone else or beat them up (and ourselves in the process).

Intuitively, I went within, I didn’t look at anyone else. I incorporated my psychic work into my coaching….and for a long time¬†I had no website, it was all in-person. When I¬†started to invest in marketing myself, I looked at the competition and that feeling of overwhelm returned.

Everyone else looked so successful and I had¬†nothing to COMPARE TO…LOL, NOTHING!

It made me GULP; I started comparing what they did and what I did. The horrible expectations and comparisons I already had going on inside me, were let loose!

What did I find in this comparison hell? Nothing, but… pain.

How did I figure a WINNING solution? How did I shut up the critic in my head?

1. I went cold turkey, no paying attention to what everyone else was doing.

It never feels good. It’s never fulfilling. It feels like shit and besides that, if there was a true formula for success, wouldn’t we all be able to do an exact copy and re-create the success?

2. Focused on my joy.

Whether I succeed or fail externally had to be put aside, when that’s the focus we’re strung out, stressed out and criticizing the crap out of our every move. Re-focus on what allows passionate engagement.

3. Believing in my own way of success.

Trusting the intuitive rather than playing ping pong in my head, means being more in the moment and engaged daily in what I do. Creating by taking action and not focusing¬†on¬†it’s success, will naturally lead us toward success or¬†realizing we need to change something.

4. Kindness

I’m human, we all are…being kind to ourselves as we smack into our limited thinking, fears and other crap, not to mention external obstacles FEELS WAY BETTER than mentally beating ourselves up. Shit will happen….the best we can do is not personalize and keep doing number 2.

Need more help with it, contact me to develop your own winning way of living!

5 Things You Should Do Every Morning

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I was thinking of a condensed list to start your day off successfully.

If you practice these daily, you will find over time that everything in your life starts to look more like a bright, shiny object that you really,really like—even if it is old. You will also find that things get easier and goals come quicker.

Here are the 5 things to start your day off on the right foot.

  1. When you go to bed the night before, right before you conk out visualize a goal in your life. As you visualize the goal, feel it through your body, as though it is already happening for you. Feel it, smile and know that you’re not in Oz….but when you wake the next day, you’ve set your subconscious to look for opportunities to fulfill the goal.
  2. If you set your alarm to wake up, set it 5-10 minutes early. Turn it off, but lay there and visualize your day in the most positive way. If potential problems have filtered there way into your mind, take this time and just be with them. This is one of your clearest points in the day, before distractions start and you are fully awake, so take advantage of your inner clarity.
  3. Exercise in the morning. This sets your day straight, because you actually have more energy and focus once you do…it allows you to accomplish more with a bounce in your step.
  4. Take your time. When you are rushed to get to work or start your day, you set the tone for what follows. No matter what is happening, you can take the time to take a deep breath and consciously slow your pace. 
  5. Write in your journal. Personally, I write in my gratitude journal first thing in the morning, so I feel more in alignment with myself and appreciative of life, even on less rosy mornings. If you don’t keep a gratitude journal, try writing for a few minutes about a topic that you’ve been avoiding. Don’t try to finish the topic and come up with a solution now, allow it to just be as it is. When you return to your journal and see the topic the next day, you will definitely have a different perspective on the subject.

All of these tips are meant to lighten your morning load and start your day off in a much more harmonious fashion. Watch what happens after one week of practicing each of these 5 things and let me know the results, I bet you’ll be surprised!!!

Enjoy!

Tracy AT tracycrossley dot com

Do You Project Failure?

the-end-old-movie

Often, we approach things with an attitude of CAN DO, when it comes to our goals. We say we’re going for it….and yet, how in alignment are our actions with the goal we want to achieve?

Sometimes, we have a goal that we think everyone will approve of and yet, we’re not really all that high on it!

And other times, even if we consciously believe we can get to the goal…our subconscious projects failure. Have you ever had that happen? Me too.

It sucks, because we start off with a¬†CAN DO¬†attitude and run into a problem, then we allow that problem to consume us or stop us. The reason the problem becomes an obstacle is our subconscious places it there…it projects it outwards.

Our subconscious is used to running the show, undercover. It learned about our place in the world at a very young age, it has been setting up our limitations ever since…and so, when we go beyond our current capacity, we receive pushback from our subconscious. It finds ways to make us stop; it’s how we sabotage ourselves.

I posted a quote on my¬†FB page¬†yesterday,¬†“Until you make the unconscious, conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”¬†~Carl Jung

And until we really gain some clarity, about our thoughts and behaviors, we will continue to stay in a loop….always finding the same issues and never moving past them.

I remember sitting with a crappy feeling recently, it was in relationship to another change I was making, I realized my feeling this way was an indication of the resistance my subconscious was creating to try and keep me safe (and unhappy). Our subconscious operates on these patterns, because it is protecting us.

We give so much meaning to these feelings of resistance that we go out and create failure to support them! Watch how your behavior aligns with those cruddy feelings….and the sense of relief you get when you fail. Seriously, there is a sense of relief that now you’re off the hook. On the other hand, it gives you more ammunition to not rise back up and go forth toward your goal…

The key is to place awareness on the feelings of resistance, realize your subconscious will look for things in your environment to become an obstacle to your goal…it looks for the familiar and that’s where your focus will be…it’ll be on¬†“this always happens”¬†or¬†“nothing looks different,”¬†even though I am working my ass off! That is YOUR subconscious, it’s an illusion…all you have to do is get clear on this…see it, know it and then in spite of what it looks like…GO FORTH!

When we reach new levels of change with ourselves, we must understand there will be new ceilings to bust through, it is an ongoing process, because our subconscious will always look for what is familiar, safe and keep us stuck there as long as we allow it….AND…

If we have goals that we don’t want, but someone told us would be good for us…this can keep us in a place of PURPOSELY projecting obstacles into our path. Looking at our goals and getting clear on if we want them or we’re just trying to do what is expected will allow us to come to a choice. When we come to the choice, just be aware that if we’re used to pleasing everyone else….it’ll feel like a HUGE resistance to actually go against the “expectation,” but when we do…we’re really forging our own road to happiness.

Want happiness, freedom, success? Abundance? Start placing awareness inside of yourself…pay attention and see how your thoughts, feelings and behaviors end up in your life….all around you. What we do in one area, we usually do in another area!

If you would like to get out of your own way and want some help getting there, please email me, I am here to help. Tracy AT Tracycrossley dot com