Sometimes I hear, “Have an Attitude of Gratitude,” with the purpose of helping me manifest what I want; have more peace, feel more open and overall, less frustrated with my current lot in life.
And at those times, when I’m most frustrated, I find it difficult to really step out of my comfort zone with it’s revolving thoughts! It’s a merry-go-round in my head! Trying to figure out why, I’m stuck in a place once again, in which, I’ve visited many times, over several years.
Now most people can relate to frustration being a difficult emotion to step out of and stop, cold turkey.
There is a certain comfort to old thoughts and lashing out at the Universe, as to why things are once again headed in an unwelcome direction. I know, because I’ve found it the most challenging time to have any gratitude for anything.
Most negative emotions can wrap us up in their clutches, making it feel impossible to be released.
We don’t get relief, so easily as to just say words of gratitude, oh no! It’s the same thing with positive affirmations, even if the words come out of our mouth, does it match our truth? Does it match our energy, our intention, our feelings?
Just saying words with no real meaning attached to it, gives us no power. It keeps us powerless, especially if the force of our anger or unhappiness is behind it.
In some of my more recent challenges, the ones, which I didn’t understand their significance or reoccurrence, I discovered something new. I came to understand my value.
People can say how wonderful we are, they can slather us in praise, and we can even look in the mirror and say, “Hmmm…not bad,” but these sentiments are not necessarily indicative of how we value ourselves.
In the past, I believed I had to work super hard to get value. I also believed that everything in my life had happened as either a reflection of me or that it was a lesson I wasn’t getting! This trifecta of thoughts would come up every time a past result, seemed to be my present outcome. I’d think of how I handled it differently, how I acted differently and how I thought differently, so how could this possibly be happening?
It dawned on me one day.
Deep inside, I felt, I did not deserve my circumstances, that in this particular event, I embraced my value. I saw where I was responsible, where I had done everything I could think of and it still had poor results. This was not a reflection of me at all. I stopped beating myself up with those recurring thoughts and felt peace.
And what does this have to do with the power of gratitude?
In the realization of my own value, came an opening. All the responsibility I carried for the external circumstances, the outcome, of all that occurred, had dropped from my shoulders. The barriers of blame, I held against the Universe and myself started to crumble. I was able to feel my way into gratitude.
Gratitude is about the present moment, not the future. When it comes to being personally-empowered, all we can be connected to in the mind, body, spirit department is now.
We can be grateful for what is and where we are today. When we value ourselves, our gratitude is clearer and less tinged with what we don’t have in the moment.
If we take a few minutes to really look at a situation, in which we’re held hostage and feel gratitude is the last place we can actually touch, it’s important to stop for a second and ask ourselves, “Have I done everything, I believe can be done in this situation, with the knowledge I have right now?” If the answer is yes, (and it usually is when we’re frustrated), then seeing where we’re applying unnecessary pressure on ourselves for the present situation to be different is key.
Where does that come from?
Once we see why we need the validation of a situation to turn out right, we can gain clarity on our actions and our value. Once we really start honoring our value, we can feel grateful for exactly what is in our lives. We can look at the frustrating situation and know that it’s teaching us gratitude. It’s taught us that there is freedom from the murkiness of believing life has done us wrong, or we’re wrong.
I can be grateful right now for all that is in my life. It allows me to be accepting, and not in such a hurry. I can look at the past and feel thankful for the experiences, which have brought to the place of value I feel in myself.
The power of true gratitude is a feeling of softening, because it connects us to a greater source than ourselves. We’re not so worried and caught up in what might never happen.
Gratitude allows us to connect to our creativity. When we are in this space of freedom, connecting to the creative within us, it opens a door to new thought. We gain a new approach and an opportunity to lessen the intensity of our circumstances, enough so, that our actions coming from gratitude can lead us to a completely different place than we are today.
Thanking every experience and person, past or present for their contribution to helping us discover our true value, places us squarely in an empowered space.
Links to the four other posts in this series: