Accepting the Holes and Living Passionately!


I used to believe I’d get to a day, where nothing would affect me anymore or life would smooth out, so “the ducks outside of me would be in a row.”

Sure, there are moments where everything in life feels like it’s in an anointed place, but those moments come and go! Life is not static, it changes. It’s our absolute refusal to get out of the way of the expression of life and allow things to just be as they are; we think we have to change it to feel better.

We don’t and I’ll tell you why.

Have you ever wished and hoped for something truly amazing to happen in your life?

We keep wondering when it’ll show up, change or happen…and then it does. As we FINALLY have our object of desire…there’s an anti-climax. Perhaps, some disappointment and a lack of fulfillment at having arrived at this destination too.

Whether it’s a relationship we’ve been wanting or a change of heart by someone we’re pining away for or a new job, client, house, vacation, etc….

Our object of desire, never stays “shiny” or “amazing”…..and perhaps, because we’ve longed for it over an extended period we might not want it anymore.

Yep, I’ve been there and sometimes it still comes up! Realizing my WANT for everything to be as I SAY, puts stress on my mind, body, emotions, etc… as I lie in a state of wait or I put an inexorable amount of energy toward having it my way.

It’s not an outside job.

We’ll only fill the holes inside of ourselves by starting there–INSIDE our bodies.

Nothing outside of us fills those empty holes for very long (infatuation anyone? Intense attachment? Etc). Nothing inside of us can permanently fill the holes 24/7 (although a higher level of contentment will always remain–there’ll always be growth)…it’s to live with the holes and live passionately. 

As I heard in a dream last night, “some of us play in the trees!!” 

We take emotional risks.

It’s accepting life and tossing expectations aside.

It doesn’t mean we have no standards for our life or the behavior of others, it means we don’t live and die by everything around us. We aren’t controlled to be in a “bad mood” over our perception of what someone else is doing or not doing.

Taking the energy from our sheer force of will and instead loving what we’re doing and being, even if we feel shitty, is called ACCEPTING and ALLOWING! And the moment we do, it dissipates into a deeper engagement of life.

Living passionately means to find what gives us joy, whether it is sitting in meditation–connecting to ourselves, or it’s dancing, laughing, crying, being creative, breaking bread with others, mountain climbing….having a business that is an extension of who we are at heart. Whatever the heck it is….live it passionately, take the leaps….the more leaps we take, the more those empty holes get filled up.

Our holes get filled by being a part of life rather than blocking the flow of it and thinking of HOW IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE.

Over-thinking, blaming, complaining, hiding, holding on and so on are ways we block life.

When fear tells us this is the only way to be, we’ve allowed ourselves to slip into a VERY FAMILIAR pattern. We put ourselves there, no one else–everyone outside of us is playing a role. It’s akin to hiring others to act the part, so we find this shitty emotional state to live in…by giving them our power, and a script that says, “Act this way, so I can remind me of my lack or not having the value to get what I want,” we create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Think I’m kidding? Our subconscious beliefs are like a metal detector picking up stuff to keep us safe in our misery. It’s the long-held belief and our supplying it truth by everything we can’t have and placing us in a state of want…of thinking “if only” everything would come together then I would be happy, that makes us think our way is the only way!

Such utter bullshit.

Human beings can live in a limited manner, it’s our choice…so stop looking for the safety of the familiar way of ACTING in life and find the scary, the vulnerable, the misery, the undone and embrace it all passionately!!

And as you do, your holes will become smaller….and create anxiety far less often, because with LIVING PASSIONATELY we realize there’s really nothing in life we have to have (beyond our basic needs) to fill us up or make us happy.

Just by accepting our holes and risking where there’s fear is the key to feeling fulfilled!!

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