Catchy title, huh? Well, you can find peace in all sorts of places. Pajama bottoms? Quite possibly.
There is a mechanism that kicks into gear when we stop the battle. It goes into full board operation when we stop our inner struggle. The action that takes place starts when we yield; we call a truce and accept.
The knack for defining a truce and allowing acceptance for your life “as is” right now is a tremendous gift.
The truce may be moment to moment.
In those spacious moments, when we are not clinging to hope or strategizing how to remove the bazillion objects standing in the way of what we think we want; a new opening starts to unfold. It could be a stepping-stone to a new passageway. Maybe its a feeling of space, relaxing and having faith that all will be as it is meant toward a happy outcome.
Amazing things happen when we realize that the way we may create pressure, emphatically trying to tell or convince someone of what we want from them or how we are right, is at a cost to our well being and we end up sacrificing who we are to have what we think we want.
I find when I am in a battle with myself over what is currently going on in my life, I take “inside action.”
I close my eyes and sort of melt into the feeling of the struggle, my battle. Asking myself, what is really going on here? Once I am clear, I make a plea or a prayer to my higher power. Usually along the lines of giving the issue up, as in NOT being attached to what the outcome is, but arriving at a place of inner peace and clarity.
My goal is NOT to win with my will, because those achievements are never fulfilling to me. The goal is to achieve peace, joy and acceptance of what is NOW, because harmony is only created from within no matter what is going on outside of us.
Now,this process is easier said than done.
Sometimes it may take days or weeks for me to get to the point of surrendering my internal battle.I get stuck in the emotions and wanting something to change outside of me and the more it doesn’t the more frustrated I may grow, until I get to the point of wanting surrender.
I also circumvent the amount of time I find myself in this unforgiving space by keeping an awareness of my thoughts, so I avoid going into a full-blown battle. If I am paying attention to my inner chatter, I usually see the triggers happening that lead me on my downward spiral.
And if I can sit with the triggers and ask if this “chatter” is true, I usually find it is not and can then carry on with not having a battlefield within.
My usual process is to identify what it is I really want and what I am not getting.
Then I give up hope of getting my way. Hope can be a nasty deterrent from inner peace. It basically keeps you from living your life in the present. A goal and hope don’t have to be buddies. You can be focused on a goal, but hope leads you astray—it is a form of “waiting”. There is never anything that you hope for which comes to you that stops that vicious cycle of waiting for the next thing you are hoping for in your life. You live in hoping and waiting…. there is no “action” in either of those words.
So, once hope has been taken out of the frame, I am free to pray. And remind myself there is only “love or fear” and inner peace and harmony are grown from love. After praying for being shown the road “kindly” to peace and harmony, I let go. I let go of what I think the outcome should be as the “be all, end all.” And I feel a release, a relaxation with all that is…I accept the very moment by surrendering to what is and knowing that what I need guidance with will be taken care of in a different way than I can imagine.
That leads me to what I do after getting clear, praying, letting go and surrendering…
I look and listen. I listen for the guidance that goes with my gut, even if it is a surprise or not how I thought things should play out…I listen for the words and I look for the signs. When you ask for answers, you receive them. It is to be open and not attached to your outcome that you achieve peace and harmony.
We participate, we don’t force. We love, and recognize our fears. We take different or “right” action with “right” view (a nod to the 8 fold path) rather than the SAME action, which keeps us stuck in our inner battlefield.
All we control is our inner playground, why not make it a fun and joyous place rather than a wasteland of discarded dreams, failures that you kick yourself over, dysfunctional relationships, or anything else which makes life seem like slugging it through the swamps.
Remember the key: Become clear on what exactly you are feeling in struggle, anger or dissatisfaction. Follow it with praying/asking/intending, letting go, surrender and opening to seeing and hearing what guidance is available to you in achieving that inner harmony and getting to your goals without your bayonet.